We often confuse talking with communicating. There is a difference. As a leader it is critical that you both understand and act upon that difference. In an excellent article (https://www.forbes.com/sites/mikemyatt/2012/04/04/10-communication-secrets-of-great-leaders/ – 9dcf34522fe9) that we will reference in the next few posts , Mike Myatt does a great job pointing out a critical difference. Often when we are trained to communicate, consider a homiletics class, we focus on pronunciation, our delivery, our posture. In other words, we focus on ourselves. Doing so may help you be an effective presenter (a “good talker”). Obviously, this is an important aspect of delivering a good homily or even more generally, in communicating. None the less, it is only a small aspect of communication, but effectively communicating must have a broader focus.
Myatt points out that although good communicators do all of the above, they also have a strong external awareness. He states, “The number one thing great communicators have in common is they possess a heightened sense of situational and contextual awareness.” What does this mean in more practical terms? They read the environment well.
They have developed an ability to truly understand their audience, be that one person, a small group or a large crowd. You are seeking to share information, but that requires knowing how to effectively connect. Being a strong, active listener with the ability to quickly sense the mood, values and concerns of those with whom you are interacting is critical.
We often enter such interactions knowing what we intend to say, but if we do not understand those we are interacting with, our message may fall on deaf ears. Often just a slight adaptation, while still respecting the integrity of our message and values, can make all the difference in the world. Knowing how your message is being received and understanding the concerns or objections of your “audience” allows you to adapt and react more effectively.
Myatt goes on to say, “The message is not about the messenger (you); it has nothing to do with the messenger; it is however 100% about meeting the needs and the expectations of those you’re communicating with.”
Consider as an example, a new program you’d like to start. It may be aligned with your vision and there seems to be general agreement in principle. Implementing it, however, will result in additional responsibilities for someone on your staff. Let’s assume they are having personal issues at home that have increased their stress level and they just see this new program and your “demands” as unreasonable and not practical.
If you don’t understand their “backstory” you might spend all your time trying to convince them using the wrong type of communication (additional facts, etc.). You need to truly listen, understand the broader picture, their issues and then see if together you can come up with a mutually agreed upon way forward.
As we continue to develop this critical function of leadership, we will offer more details on how to become a more effective communicator which will allow you to become a better leader.