We continue to look at the concept of leading a divided team by focusing on an excellent blog written by Pastor Carey Nieuwhof (https://www.biblicalleadership.com/blogs/4-keys-to-leading-in-an-angry-era/).
In our first blog we focused on the first of 4 principles that Pastor Nieuwhof offered; “Start with the core, not the crowd”. He urged us to gain unity among your core team. In our part 2 blog, we moved beyond the core to the larger crowd. Here we were encouraged to move forward confidently when you have engaged everyone, understood all perspectives and addressed concerns when possible. In this blog we will focus on how to build unity.
To accomplish this, we must often readjust our focus. Obviously, as we’ve stated there is a lot to divide us right now. That creates tension on a team. Pastor Niewhof’s 3rd principle is rather than focus on the disagreement change your focus to what you agree on. In other words, what unites the people you lead? You may be thinking, you don’t know my team – there is nothing united about them; this is impossible.
I will agree it may be difficult, but as we all know, with God’s help, nothing is impossible. So, where do we start? Although there may be a few pathological exceptions that need to be dealt with in a different manner (see previous blogs on teamwork), let’s start with the thought that most people want to do their best in their role on your team. Yes, they may approach that goal differently due to their personal history, but in general they want to be part of a successful team.
Hopefully, any member of your team agrees and supports the overall mission. If that is not the case, a deep discussion needs to happen immediately. If you cannot obtain support of this very basic core, it may require that the person be taken off the project or possibly even your team. Even with agreement to the basic premise of a mission, there may still be some areas of disagreement.
One way to approach this is to follow a method used successfully in counseling. Start by asking real questions where you seek to understand rather than be understood. How did they arrive at their current opinion or position on the issue? Try and listen for their underlying values and acknowledge them.
As an example, “I hear you are very dedicated to XXX and you feel this may not be aligned with that position.” “Have I captured that correctly?” If not, continue the discussion until they agree you understood. This should start to de-escalate some tension. Then you can move to seeking unity. “I think we both agree that XXX is critical to our mission and I understand why you feel the way you do.” “Would you mind if I shared my perspective on this?”
In this manner, you will hopefully continue on a path that will lead to understanding and support. While they may never be 100% aligned, they should feel that they’ve been heard, understood and as a result are willing to collaborate. As we’ve seen in the previous blog, this should be the case 90% of the time. If so, you’ve quite successfully addressed a difficult situation and in the process your leadership and your team will be strengthened.